Unca, baby, you're spending way to much time on this stuff.  Better you
should be out looking for that rich orfan orifice.

ROTF, LMAO

Mike

----- Original Message -----
From: "Joel Walker" <jwalker17@EARTHLINK.NET>
To: <vanagon@GERRY.VANAGON.COM>
Sent: Friday, October 27, 2000 9:37 PM
Subject: Re: Weekly statz/ Bios

> > Name:  Unca Joel
>                alias Joel Calhoun Toutant de Beuregard Walker
>                alias Sam Magee
>                aka Foghorn J. Legghorn
> > sex:      seben.  ate.  mime.  zen.
> > state/country: Tookalooka, Amabala. Hew Hess Hay. Down South.
>                         Waaaay Down South. where the Kudzu blooms and
> blows,
>                          Why he left his home in the South to roam
>                          Round the pole, God only knows.
> > Number of Vanagons:     too.
>                                          1987 Vanagon Camper GL P27.
> platinum.
>                                                   180,000 miles.
>                                                   Hermann the Hermit
> Crab.
>                                           1988 Vanagon GL. blue.
>                                                   145,000 miles.
>                                                   Gustave/Gus
> > Sweet Gum trees in yard: two damned many!
> > Color of yard:       pine straw and sweet gum balls. (pine trees
> have no balls).
> > Lawn Mower:    John Deere riding RX-95 green turbo turtle.
> > Favorite Movie Star:   None.
> > Favorite Quote:          Non.
> > Favorite Religious Personnage:  Nun.
> > Favorite Time of Day:   Noon.
> > Favorite Pasttime:         Moon.
> > Favorite Month:            June.
> > color of hair:                 blue.
> > colour of eyes:              same as hair.
> > wait:                          130 stone.
> > hite:                           1.83 meter
> > circumference:           6 feet (2 of which are at the ends of my
> legs)
> > places traveled:          Gawga, Mississississippippi, Tennennessee,
> kentucky,
>                                     All over Amabala, Nawth Carolina,
> South Carolina, Virginny,
>                                     Pennsylvania, New Yawk, Rode
> Island, New Jersey, Old Jersey,
>                                     Texas, Lou's E-anna, little bit of
> New Mexico and Arid-zona,
>                                      littler bit of Californicate,
> Coloradio, Chicago and surrounds,
>                                      Miss Ouri, someplace in Kansas,
> Tulsa in OkieDokie,
>                                       Nebraska near Omahaha and
> Lincoln Logs, Northwest Florida,
>                                      Saigon, Nha Trang, Long Binh,
> Bien Hoa, and points west,
>                                      Hong Kong (before the tunnel),
> Sydney in Australia (before the
>                                       Opera House), Katoomba in NSW
> with all the dirty sheep.
> > people seen on travels:   3
> > occupation:      something that involves computers. the voices tell
> me what to do.
>                            i try to resist, but i get paid if i do
> what they want.
>                            if i listen really close, i can hear the
> computers talking to each other.
> > time til retirement:         5 years, 8 months, 13 days, 1 hour and
> 13 minutes.
> > scars:                 yes, two volkswagen buses.
> > tattoos:               no, i never learned to play the drums.
> > medical history:  insanity does NOT run in my family; it practically
> gallops.
>                             and the only times i have ever been sick
> in my life, there were
>                             doctors involved. i have been avoiding
> doctors ever since.
> > criminal history:  never got caught.
> > political history:   vote the bastards out!! let some new crook have
> a chance.
> > Geneological history:   Levi's. maybe Wranglers.
> > Notable Forebears:      actually, only two were bears. the others
> were semi-famous
>                                       politicians ...
>                                       Benjamin Yancey Martin, lawyer
> (but we never held it against
>                                           him) and state senator or
> representative (he'd never tell us
>                                           which).
>                                       Chief Walks-like-stick-up-butt,
> Choctaw potentate in the early
>                                            1800's.
> > Historical history:        i am not historical. i am usually very
> calm.
> > Military History:          U.S.Army, enlisted. took the Queen's
> shilling and served
>                                      my time. parted company as an
> E-5/Sergeant. saw lots of
>                                      things that were green.
> > hobbies:            combing beard, makes christmas ornaments out of
> ear wax and
>                             toothpaste, kit bashing.
> > Grade Point Average:    1.8 out of 3.0
> > Degrees Obtained:         Bachelor of Arts in Mathematics and
> Computer Science
>                                         NRI Associate Degree in
> Cosmotology and Hair Styling
>                                         Dr. Scholl's Home School of
> Pedicure, Magna Cum Laude
>                                         105F during fits of malaria
>                                         -62F with wind chill (snot
> freezes)
> > Marital Status:               never again. unless she's a very rich
> blind mute orphan.
>                                         and good looking. did i
> mention rich?
> > Martial Status:                14th Degree Red Welt in Kat Wa Shing.
> > Social Status:                 Local Hermit, Village Idiot in
> Training.
> > Financial Status:             Easy Come, and Easy Go.
>                                          It's not just what, but Who
> You Know.
> > Stasis Status:                  Milk of Magnesia before bedtime.
>