I really like this story.  Really.

Maybe US customs aren't the rudest in the world.

We're not number one, we're not number one.

Mike

----- Original Message -----
From: pensioner <al_knoll@PACBELL.NET>
To: <vanagon@GERRY.VANAGON.COM>
Sent: Sunday, January 28, 2001 10:47 AM
Subject: Battle Stations....Prepare to repel "boarders"

> "Boarders" indeed.
>
> David...
>
> You HAD to ask.
>
> The bleedin canucks of course.  They got nothing to do.  On a moto trip up
> to Vancouver and across to Moose Jaw and down I was searched and the BMW
> R100RS was virtually disassembled looking for ??.  Sez them, we check
every
> so often as a matter of course... you're it.  My friends, also on BMWs
just
> pottled around for the two hours it took to ensure I wasn't smuggling any
> nuclear devices, IR sensing antiaircraft hand helds, 27" televisions, TDI
> Motors, or contraband toilets in my R100RS.  Now dave, how much can one
hide
> on a moto?  Secret stashes?  the leetle compartment under the seat?  In
the
> headlight shell? in the taillight?, under the battery? in the gas tank? in
> the aircleaner?  They checked em all.  Found nothing but contraband
> motorcycle parts like headlights, taillights, battery boxes, gasoline.
> Seemed to amuse the ninnies.  These folks are REALLY on the dole.  No
wonder
> the jobless rate is so high in BC.
>
> And they presume someone would escape TO the great white mosquito and
> blackfly-ridden north so they make sure you have sufficient assets to
cover
> your asset (in my case a Corbin ass-set on the moto) so you won't hawg in
on
> their part of the dole...
>
> grumble grumble.
>
> THEN we had four fine days motoring around in the fine Canadian Rain.
Truly
> joyful on a moto.  I blame the customs critters for the weather
too...kinda
> sour grapes for not finding a contraband toilet or something..  Thank
> heavens for Roger at MotoSpeziale in Alberta for showing the true Canadian
> Color and working on a Sunday to fix a new-fangled electronical ignition
> system on one of the motos that had taken leave of its Ebers and Moll
> constraints and left "Peach" with a dead horse.
>
> In contrast, coming back from Mexico in a vanagon packed with campy and
> camping gear including tons of schlocky souvenir pots and dewdads, US dude
> says to the scruffly desert dirty driver (me) "can I see your drivers
> license"  yeppo.  "anything to declare?"  ..."I have an open liter of fine
> Herradura Anejo and two other liters of liquor and some souvenirs (limit
is
> one).  "thanks, have a good trip"...I coulda been smuggling my R100RS AND
> all the swill the canucks seemed to be concerned about and I coulda stolen
> the drivers license AND the syncro..."thanks, have a good trip"  gotta
love
> 'em.  Didn't see the Federales checking out the line goin the other way to
> see if there was any illegal immigrants heading south to work as braceros
in
> Mexico but that's another story.
>
> pensioner
>
> (ruffled grouch)
>