ROTF, LMAO.

I'll lend you a 12 gauge.  That might work.

Mike

On 3/4/03 12:02 AM, "Mark Belanger" <belanger@FLUID.COM> wrote:

> [Before you read another word, if you're first answer to a problem is
> "just *buy* a damn replacement," you shouldn't continue reading.  You
> have been warned... ]
>
> After tons of scouring Google and Gerry and my local bible and trying to
> learn the goddamn German language I'm still no closer to an answer of
> how to get that damn distributor pin out.  So, in typical American
> fashion, I decided to resort to violence.  Since I don't own a gun(I
> live in San Francisco), I had to opt for less exciting technique of a
> drill press and a Dremel.
>
> Before I continue, perhaps a little background: It all started with me
> trying to figure out why my '91 would crank, but not start.  Thanks to
> the likes of Ward Smith and Devon Campbell(you know, he's the guy who
> wanted to rebuild his first engine, whom a number of you heartless vets
> crushed without blinking), I was able to track the problem down to a bad
> Hall Sender.  For those of you who have no idea what what one looks
> like, check out the following blurry photo.  Pay close attention to the
> lovely straight pin in the photo on the right.  It'll be making a
> sinister return later in the story.
>
> Two Hall Senders: I wonder which one is new...
> http://www.geocities.com/mbelanger/dist/dist0.JPG
>
> Haynes manual has a fairly simple description of how one takes apart a
> distributor.  My favorite line from 5b4 20.a, "The shaft is removed from
> the distributor body after extracting the pin which secures the driving
> dog to the base of the shaft" implying that one can do this with a pair
> of eye tweezers.  As you can tell from the first photo, I used a bit
> more than tweezers to get that goddamn "driving dog" off.  I figured I
> had license to destroy since the replacement Hall Sender came with a
> replacement dog, pin and spring.
>
> (For those obsessive among you, here's a closeup of my freshly clean
> distributor head with the various proper model numbers displayed
> [http://www.geocities.com/mbelanger/dist/dist0a.JPG].  Not that I'm
> obsessive for actually cleaning the damn thing and taking a picture of it).
>
> So I have my freshly cleaned distributor and replacement parts ready to
> go, as you can see here.  If you have a microscope, you can see that I
> used about 10 gallons of WD40 to make the parts so clean I could eat off
> of them(I had macaroni and cheese).
>
> Mmm, shiny old parts...
> http://www.geocities.com/mbelanger/dist/dist1.JPG
>
> So for those of you who haven't figured it out, that split open "driving
> dog," is supposed to fit on the end of the distributor shaft, with the
> pin and large spring to hold it in place.  I assume it all works, *IF*
> you can get the old bastard out, which seems to have been cold welded in
> place by nihilistic sprocket-dancing VW engineers.  It doesn't budge.  I
> tried pliers, clamps, vises, drill bits and even a "persuader" with zero
> luck.  The thing won't move.  Following is a nice detailed picture of
> the havoc that I hath wrought upon my distributor:
>
> Old and new.  A tired spring and a new pin.
> http://www.geocities.com/mbelanger/dist/dist3.JPG
>
> (Slight digression on dialect: Our Vanagons seem to be quite popular
> over in Europe for some reason and the Haynes manual was written by some
> blokes out of Somerset, England.  They use strange terms like "driving
> dog," which seems to have no earthly translation and according to Google
> is only used by people referring to canines.  They also use terms like
> "tyres," which I can only assume refers to some sadistic satanic ritual.
> I hope I don't get burned in one of them...  Lastly, they explain in
> detail how to pass MOT tests.  I've been studying for my test for
> months.  Hopefully I'll pass...  Don't be scared.  It's the same
> language, just written by people who actually understand what the word
> "affectation" means.  If you're still confused, I recommend studying as
> many episodes of "Benny Hill" as you can get your hands on.)
>
> Where were we... Oh, yeah.  My troubles.  So I'm still trying to get
> that damn pin out.  At this point, I've written to a number of the
> illiterati(should that be illiteratati?) from the Vanagon list with no
> result.  A couple of people told me to give up the ghost and buy a
> replcament, whatever that means...  Peter from Volkscafe, who sold me
> the replacement Hall Sender and warned me "not to break" my distributor,
> hasn't replied telling me his secret technique yet.  I plan on stalking
> him very soon...  Stan Wilder did his best to understand my problem
> claiming that I found the first thing on a Vanagon he hadn't worked on.
> He did his best to wrap his head around the problems of us waterworld
> people before he suggested I throw my distributor in the freezer.  "Oh,
> yeah.  That'll get the pin out," he said.  He also told me to stick a
> firecracker up my ass.  Stan, the firecracker didn't seem to work, but
> the distributor is still in the freezer.  I'll tell you how that goes
> after I can sit down again.
>
> Thus far flumoxed, I again resorted to violence and broke out the Dremel
> with a vicious grinder attachment, which at least got me to the point
> where I could take the damn thing apart.  You can see my damage here:
>
> Please ignore the gouges.  They're casualties of war.
> http://www.geocities.com/mbelanger/dist/dist2.JPG
>
> So here I am.  I have an immaculate set of Distributor components with
> no clue to get that pin out and attach the new dog and pin.  For those
> of you who disregarded my earlier warning and read on, I *will* get this
> distributor working again if I have to take out of all of Western
> civilization to do it.
>
> Now before I commit such a heinous crime, any advice?
>
>
> Thanks,
> -MB
>
> Mark Belanger wrote:
>> Greetings all,
>>
>> Is it possible to remove the pin from what Haynes refers to as the pin
>> for the bottom of the "driving dog" without use of a small tactical
>> nuke?  This is the pin that holds the off-center key at the bottom of
>> the distributor which connects to the shaft below.
>>
>> If so, I'd love to hear before I heat up the flame thrower.
>>
>>
>> Thanks,
>> MB
>