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Subject:Re: Best chance of passing emissions?
From:Robert Cardo
Date:Fri, 19 Aug 2005 08:13:29 -0500

<< Be sure to get into the passenger seat, and start talking with the
tester.
It works every time here for me on the dyno emissions test.
Yeah, but few of us are as charming as you. >>

A little constuctive BS goes a long way George, and as long as it gets
the job done, what the hay. : )

Back when I had my 1.9 ( some 7-8 years ago ) and on it's first test I
got out of the Van and walked into the waiting room.

I sat there and watched this idiot beating the snot out of the Van.
Not once, not twice, not three times, but for four consecutive times he
ran the Van wide open on the roller's, and had the back tire's smoking
on it.

With this act I flew out of the waiting area  screaming " what in the
hell are you doing?"

"Uhh, hey man I can't get this thing to get enough power to get the
roller's up to speed"

This idiot had the computer set to V8 Chevy van specs.

The testing stations here do not have a clue what a Vanagon is, let
alone what the horse specs are.

They aren't even listed in the specification books, nor in the computer.

These guys testing you Van are minimum wage type, and don't know the
difference between a Vanagon, or a Vauxhall and don't really care .

It's best to be on the ball and take the ride on the roller's with them.
Don't ask, just jump in the passenger seat.

Make an eye opening statement like; " Hey, don't go beating the shit
outa my Van now"

It works every time.

The last time I was there with one of my current Van's they didn't even
have an adapter to fit the gas cap for the test.

"Wow man, this cap looks good"

What a trip into Disneyland.

Take a high end blast with the tank half full of HEET, get the vehicle
good and hot,and slide over to the state emmissions testing station, lay
a 12 pack of MIller Lite on the driver's seat.

It'll pass.