">Don't worry, it's my last one for real now. It just happen to be the ugliest
>of all.
>
>Ben"
>

"my last one for real"...sounds like a comment an alcoholic would make, "this is my last drink, for real"

Are you sure you are not a Vanaholic?   Or maybe just a RustyVanagonAholic?

Maybe we need an intervention and then enroll you in a 12 step program...  :)