On Wed, 16 Nov 94 13:38:19 CST William R. Kennedy said:
>Why ASCII.  Why not a Web page with map of the world.  Click on a dot, get
>full color photo of van and owner, click again for full scanned repair history
>with receipts.  Other hypertext jumps for each cat, musical instrument,
>fish dish, flannel pattern.  C'mon Joel, it's almost 1995, and whatever we
>*can* do, we *must* do.  It's the Internet way.

The following is a press-release, from the staff at Bryce Hospital for the
Mentally Confused, and the staff at Charles L. Seebeck Computer Center for
the University of Alabama:

Mr. Joel Walker was admitted this afternoon, after being cornered in a pecan
tree, just back of the Math, Psychology, and Computer Center Building on the
campus of the University of Alabama.  He was knocked out of the tree by a
tranquilizer dart, but was semi-conscious as they wrapped him in the
protective straight-jacket.  He was muttering about "ass-key", which was
unintelligible to most of the attendants.  The on-site diagnosis was some
sort of psycho-sexual reversion-repressive neurosis, possibly bordering on
schizophrenia, with complications of delusions of grandeur.

His position will be filled as quickly as possible, in order to preserve the
stabilization of the budgetary outflux and local economy during the upcoming
holiday season. He will, in all liklihood, be hardly missed.