More Humor ehh?
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Forwarded message:
>From:	lars@pacbell.net (Larry Stone)
Reply-to:	lars@pacbell.net
To:	bayer+@andrew.cmu.edu (Amy E Bayer), bay@WILLAPABAY.ORG (Amy Watts),
rfethers@mail.coos.or.us (Bob Fetherson), bluesplayr@aol.com (Bob Hencier),
krill555@aol.com (Charlie Blackmore), rtigger@ix.netcom.com (Chris Knox),
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ileah@a.crl.com (Ileah Crawford), joshcz@hotmail.com (Josh Czerwinski),
SlvrSlave@aol.com (Leah Stone), LSCHAEFR@strattec.com (Leigh Schaefer),
lcscolgate@aol.com (Lynn Stone), mstone@strattec.com (Michael Stone),
michel@ricochet.net (Michel Floyd), hamodi@pemail.net (Mohamad AL-Mukhtar),
stonenmns@aol.com (Sheldon Stone), victory@victorylane.com (Sherrie),
StanH74226@aol.com (Stan Hannah)
Date: 97-07-15 22:13:04 EDT

from michel@ricochet.net
Texas Quotes:

"Cyanide is a scare word."

- Director of the Texas Water Quality Board

"It just makes good sense to put all your eggs in one basket."

- Texas Rep. Joe Salem speaking on an amendment requiring all  revenues
to go into the state treasury

"Lemme give ya' a hypothetic."

- Texas Rep. Renal Rosson

"Ain't nothin' in the middle of the road but yellow stripes and dead
armadillos."

- Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower

"And now, will y'all stand and be recognized?"

- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis to a group of handicapped    people in
wheelchairs

"Dallas salutes a person who can buy a piece of art, but not a person
who can create one."

- A. C. Greene

"No thanks, once was enough."

- Texas Governor Bill Clements, asked if he had been born    again

"Oh good.  Now he'll be bi-ignorant."

- Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower when told that  Texas
Governor Bill Clements had been studying Spanish

"I'd just make a little bit of money, I wouldn't make a whole lot."

- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis defending himself against the  charge
that he would personally profit from a bill he had  introduced.

"Well, there never was a Bible in the room."

- Texas Governor Bill Clements, asked about repeatedly lying   about the
SMU football scandal.

"I am filled with humidity."

- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"You can teach 'em to type, but you can't teach 'em to grow tits."

- Texas Rep. Charlie Wilson, on secretaries

"Spending on the military doesn't increase the deficit."

- Ronald Reagan

"If ignorance ever goes to $40 a barrel, I want drillin' rights on that
man's head."

- Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower discussing    President
George Bush's policies

"Well, on the manhood thing, I'll put mine up against his any time."

- George Bush discussing a Walter Mondale comment that he    didn't have
the manhood to apologize for an incorrect     assertion 

"If it's dangerous to talk to yourself, it's probably even dicier to
listen..."

- Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower 

"I move we recess to go outside and throw up."

- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis during a budget hearing

"This is a real competitive business."

- A gas station owner, when asked to explain the rapid rise in  gasoline
prices when Kuwait was invaded

"...idiots, imbeciles, aliens, the insane and women..."

- Law standing in Texas until 1918 regulating who could not  vote

"It's the sediment of the House that we adjourn."

- Texas House Speaker Wayne Clayton

"Let's do this in one foul sweep." - Texas House Speaker Wayne Clayton

"This is unparalyzed in the state's history."

- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis 

"I want to thank each and every one of you for having extinguished
yourselves this session."

- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"We'll run it up the flagpole and see who salutes that booger."

- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"There's a lot of uncertainty that's not clear in my mind."

- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"I can explain it for you, but I can't understand it for you."

- Anon.

"There are still places where people think that the function of the
media is to provide information."

- Don Rottenberg

"Which one is that?"  "I just voted the way my wife told me to; she knew
what it was."

- Texas gubernatorial candidate Clayton Williams, when asked   how he
had voted on the only proposition on the Texas ballot 
-- 

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Larry Stone                                mailto:lars@pacbell.net