The Top 14 Signs Your Mechanic Is Losing It

 14>  That photo of a naked A.J. Foyt on his wall.

 13>  You catch him in his office making auto noises and
      "shifting gears", if you know what I mean.

 12>  Replaces your fan belt with a pair of bikini underwear.

 11>  Embroidered "Mr. Bad-Ass Wrench" on his shirt.

 10>  Hose from air pump leads into his coveralls.

  9>  Keeps asking if you're sure you don't want a "lube job."

  8>  Still doing work for OJ and expecting to get paid.

  7>  Eats Go-Jo off finger as if it were peanut butter.

  6>  Giggles uncontrollably whenever anyone says, "lug nuts."

  5>  "Heh heh, he said 'dipstick'.  Heh heh, heh heh."

  4>  Replaces diagnostic computer with Magic 8 Ball.

  3>  Urinates on your tire and says, "Just marking my turf."

  2>  Rewires the cruise control to the radio so that the
      faster the music, the faster your car goes.

 and the #1 Sign Your Mechanic Is Losing It...

  1>  Won't stop humming "The Wheels on the Bus Go 'Round
      and Round.">>

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