You might be an engineer if ...
. choosing to buy flowers for your girlfriend or upgrading your RAM is a moral dilemma.
. you take a cruise so you can go on a personal tour of the engine room.
. in college you thought Spring Break was metal fatigue failure.
. the sales people at the local computer store can't answer any of your questions
. at an air show you know how fast the skydivers are falling
..you bought your wife a new CD-ROM drive for her birthday.
. you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie.
. you can type 70 words per minute but can't read your own handwriting.
. you comment to your spouse that his/her straight hair is nice and parallel
. you sit backwards on the Disneyland rides to see how they do the special effects
. you have saved every power cord from all your broken appliances
..you have more friends on the Internet than in real life.
. you know what "http://" stands for.
. you look forward to Christmas so you can put the kids' toys together.
. you see a good design and still have to change it.
. you spent more on your calculator than you did on your wedding ring.
. you still own a slide rule and know how to use it.
. you think that people yawning around you are sleep deprived.
. you window shop at Radio Shack
. your laptop computer costs more than your car.
. your spouse hasn't the foggiest idea of what you do at work.
. you've already calculated how much you make per second.
. you've tried to repair a $9 appliance

Q: When does a person decide to become an engineer?
A: When he realizes he doesn't have the charisma to be an undertaker.

Q: What do engineers use for birth control?
A: Their personalities.

Q: How can you tell an extroverted engineer?
A: When he talks to you, he looks at your shoes instead of his own.

Q: Why did the engineers cross the road?
A: Because they looked in the file and that's what they did last year.

Q: How do you drive an engineer completely insane?
A: Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him, and fold up a road map the wrong way.

G. Matthew Bulley
Director
Bulley-Hewlett & Associates
www.bulley-hewlett.com
Cary, NC USA
888.468.4880 tollfree